Wednesday, November 19, 2025

Legalese


Well, we haven't covered the avocado yet, and so far, so good. It's only 40º F (about 4.5º C) out there this morning, but the temperature is supposed to plunge this evening so I have to get a cover on today. I'm debating whether to do it this morning before I leave for work, or this evening when Dave will be here to help but it will be dark. Or maybe I'll even come home at lunchtime. Decisions, decisions.

I've been having a back-and-forth with the attorney I hired to do our estate planning. This guy has done legal work for others in my family and I chose him for that reason, asking him to write a will for me and Dave. I paid him for his services, and then the will turned into a trust, which turned into multiple trusts. It seemed to be getting very complicated and he was having doubts about his approach because we have assets in two countries, so he brought in another lawyer with experience in Britain. This lawyer consulted with us once and said the trusts could be a problem, but then stopped returning my calls, which often happens when they see how complicated our situation is relative to how much money we have (not much).

The funny thing is, it's really not that complicated. We don't have kids. We don't own real estate. It's all liquid assets. But since the first lawyer bailed, I've tried three more on both sides of the pond, and after an initial consultation they've all either declined to take our case or simply stopped calling me back. (It's not my personality, I swear.)

So estate planning is still in limbo. The back-and-forth is resulting from the fact that I pre-paid the first lawyer. He offered to refund part of our money, and I've been pressing him to follow through with that, but getting money out of a lawyer is not easy. I do want to pay him for his time, because I sort of talked him into taking our case, but after all, we didn't get a finished product -- so I feel like I'm due something. He has finally agreed to refund us $500, which is about an eighth of what I paid him. It's better than nothing.

(I can tell already this post is going to attract all kinds of spam comments from estate planners. Please refrain, spammers! I will not hire you based on a blog comment!)

I'm also trying to schedule a meeting with my financial planners, given that I'm about to retire, to talk to them about options. I blew the last meeting on Zoom because I totally forgot about it -- unlike me, but it's been busy around here.


It's hard to be a responsible adult, you know?

Meanwhile, in the library, my days have been nonstop. Yesterday was particularly crazy: multiple classes, several carts of re-shelving, two stints in the Lower School, a stack of new books to cover and of course my regular checking in and out. One of the librarians organized a family book club that involved setting up an "Everest Base Camp" in the library. Fortunately, I didn't have to help with that, but just as I left yesterday evening someone was erecting a tent in the middle of the floor! Get me out of here!

(Photos: A flower shop in West Hampstead, and graffiti on my walk to work.)

63 comments:

  1. Worried about your financial affairs in two countries? Have no fear! The Pudding Legal Team can offer a bespoke package at minimal cost. We have years of experience in this minefield and can guarantee smooth and untroubled service with offices here in Sheffield. Yorkshire and Palmetto, Florida. Go to www.yplt@ripemoff.com

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  2. Codex: Sorry. You got scammed. This is straightforward as you mentioned. Trust is only done for large assets.

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    1. You would think so, right? But apparently it's NOT that straightforward, given the runaround I have received! I've also tried will-writing services through "Which?" magazine and online and they won't work with us because we have international assets. Trusts are actually very common in the USA. "Large" is a relative term.

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    2. As I understand it, Codex, the main reason for trusts is to avoid probate.

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    3. Codex: I'm angry on Steve's behalf. He overpaid, the guy didn't do the job. Probate isn't necessary in his case. He needs someone who specializes in wills.

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    4. Codex: There's enough decent advice here. One option is to separate the two countries. (One for each).

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    5. Thanks for being angry on my behalf, but Ms. Moon is right -- I was told that merely writing a will would be a bad idea because my estate would still need to go through probate. My mother had a trust for the assets that my brother and I inherited, so it's not an outrageous idea. I don't think I overpaid, but I did make a mistake in talking the guy into doing the job. He had doubts from the beginning given our situation. That's why I'm not pushing for a refund. He did a lot of work before deciding he couldn't see it through.

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  3. An eighth of what you paid is $500! You are getting something wrong. You can't be the only person who is in the same situation. Go online and ask around. Don't you have workmates in similar situations?
    And do you really need to pay a financial planner, when your affairs seem quite simple? The closest match in Australia to your pension funds would be our superannuation funds, where the majority of my income comes from. They are not allowed to offer financial planning advice, but they can offer advice about what do with your money in relation to what is in the pension fund and how you may use other money in relation to the pension fund.

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    1. And now as citizens of the UK, you are entitled to the social security system, and that could well offer some advice. Sort it out before you retire as you may not have time to do so once you retire.

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    2. Surprisingly, people I've talked to at work often don't have quite the same situation. I'll leave it at that for purposes of not spreading too much of my private life around on line!

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  4. I’m beginning to hate being an adult. We have a lawyer writing our Spanish wills because our American wills won’t apply here. Not as complicated as yours it seems. Our nephew is moving to Spain next year with his wife and we’re leaving everything (all €12) to them.

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    1. It helps a lot when you're leaving your assets to someone in-country!

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  5. With family and assets now in three countries on two continents, I know what you are struggling with. Don't let them fool you.
    A base camp in the library? Do they get Brownie points? Or rather, you should get them.

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    1. Ha! I definitely should get some points for patience!

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  6. This sounds like a freaking nightmare and something no one wants to deal with. I'm sorry. There's got to be an easier solution. At least one would think. Adulting is hard as hell.
    I believe we may need a picture of the tent in the library.

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    1. I did not take any pictures, alas. There were kids around so I avoided that.

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  7. Good on you for doing the estate planning. Lots of people put it off because they find it disturbing thinking about death and such, but it's better to have it done.

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  8. Why not do a deed of gift to an American relative, and be done with the American assets? If you'd be leaving then the funds anyway, do it now. There, expert advice from a lady without two pennies to rub together!

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    1. Well, I don't want to give anything away now. I (hopefully) still have years of life left and I may need my money! But I do have declared beneficiaries for the accounts.

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  9. Good luck with all that. I suspect the dual-location gets to be a big problem. All this reminds me I need to revisit my attorney to modify my trust, change the secondary executor and such. I hate doing this stuff and really drag my feet on it. UGH. And yes, keep at him for the refund.

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    1. Yes, if we were entirely in one country or the other it would all be much easier.

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  10. I can see how a trust spanning two continents would be hard to write and enact. It is probably much easier to write a trust for assets on each continent separately but then that would likely require two lawyers, one on each continent.

    Just a thought but since all your assets are liquid, do you have the ability to fill out a TOD (Transfer On Death) form? I know all my liquid assets on this side of the pond either have a TOD filled our or have a direct beneficiary listed. Thus our trust is only for physical assets like property and real estate. Not sure if Great Britain has a similar mechanism.

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    1. My accounts do have direct beneficiaries, so at least there's that.

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    2. So if you have direct beneficiaries, you are only concerned with your physical assets/personal belongings? It is worth paying to set up a trust for that? I own a home and several cars which are really the only physical assets I have to worry about. All the stuff inside my home will likely be picked through and the vast majority of it tossed in the landfill.

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  11. I should add, the above TOD or direct beneficiary would only work if you want to give all your remainder assets directly upon death. If you want to parcel it out gradually over years, then some sort of trust is likely what you have to do.

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    1. No, I'm fine with handing it over. I'll be dead!

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  12. Mike and I haven't even thought about estate planning (even though I used to work as an estate planning legal assistant - ha!). We really should at the very least handwrite wills for each other since we don't have kids. I don't want some random relative (my brother) to have to jump through a bunch of hoops for our little bit of money.

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    1. Exactly -- it saves a lot of headaches in the end to have everything sorted out.

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  13. CrossBorderWealth .com UK/US experts. I had 3 hours of zoom calls without having to commit to using them. Excellent podcasts full of info. Might be worth a look :)

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    1. OK, thanks for the suggestion! I will check it out!

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  14. You've reminded me of the few weeks before I left for London when I was scrambling to get a will written before I left. My sister is dealing with a very ill husband and she insisted that I get that taken care of before I left because she said she simply could not deal with things if something happened to me. I ended up writing one myself, having it witnessed at work and giving copies to appropriate people. It's nothing fancy but it will work.

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    1. I didn't know I could write my own will in this day and age. I thought modern laws had done away with that!

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  15. There must be many people in your same situation so I agree with the suggestion to ask around. Don't you have some American friends in London?

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    1. I do, but I'm not sure they have assets remaining in the states.

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  16. Our wills are very simple. If I go first Marc gets everything, if he goes first I get everything, once we are both gone our two children get everything equally. I don't really understand why a trust is beneficial with a small amount of assets and (or no) descendants. I'll have to look it up. What a pain to have to deal with lawyers.

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    1. It has something to do with probate. Apparently wills have to be probated, at least in Florida, and this is considered bad.

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    2. My aunt's and sister's wills were probated which essentially is just making sure all outstanding debts are paid from the remaining estate and other legal documents are rendered, like transfering the ownership of her house to me. It took time, almost a year before I got title but it wasn't a big deal. I guess it depends on the lawyer. My aunt's east Texas lawyer refused to release the estate to me even after all bills were paid so they could keep drawing a payment for continued management. I had the estate transferred to a lawyer in town and finally got the funds to distribute to family members.

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  17. My understanding is, US lawyers try to avoid tax on estates and the last time I checked a single trust can hold up to 1M and avoid tax which is advantageous. I have no idea how a trust works when the money is held in both the UK and US.
    We have a freeze every night and the garden is sleeping until Spring.
    Fortunately, the temperature still rises to 40+ degrees F daily.

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    1. Under current law, a married couple can shelter $27.98 million from federal estate taxes using trusts. State estate taxes vary state to state but a number follow federal guidelines too.

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    2. Ed: WHOA! Well, I certainly don't have THAT much money. LOL

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    3. Although the higher limit was recently made into permanent law with the "Big Beautiful Bill", I suspect it will come down with the next administration/power shift. I think under Biden's plan, had Harris been elected, it was forecasted to be around $12 million or $6 million per person which still likely covers 98% of the population.

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  18. I have a tea towel that says "Coffee, because adult-ing is hard"!

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    1. That's right -- coffee is all that gets me through.

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  19. I have TOD for my investments and POD for my bank account. I'm not sure how that works with two countries involved though. It sounds like a mess. Hope you can get some help with it!

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    1. I have the same, but I'm concerned it's not enough, especially with two governments involved.

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  20. I should mention that I also have a will. (not a trust)

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  21. Estate planning is a headache. We had a lawyer who specialized in wills. It went well. I hope you find somebody who is good.

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    1. I'm so sick of thinking about it. I've been trying for years to get this done.

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  22. ... well, I like the photograph showing the flower shop in West Hampstead :)

    All the best Jan

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    1. Thanks! It's a cute shop. That's where I bought my autumn chrysanthemums!

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  23. Makes me realise how fortunate we were to have a cycling friend who is a lawyer specialising in Estates...his wedding present to us was our wills.

    That graffiti face is class!

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  24. Good luck. I'm no help, but I do like the store front photos!

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  25. I agree with what Boud said. Pass on the international assets to simplify things at your end. I have no idea about trusts and making a will is a horrifying thought. I don't have money to leave, nor a house, I am in a rented housing trust flat (subsidised public housing). I spoke with my daughter yesterday suggesting I just leave everything to her and then she can let the other three come and take what they want. She was okay with that idea and I know she will be fair.

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    1. In the US, if you die without a will, it means you die "intestate" and that involves having lawyers sort out the estate. So maybe make a simple will just to formalize your thoughts. Perhaps, as some said above, you could even do it without a lawyer.

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