Monday, January 2, 2012

Aftermath


Our dessicated Christmas tree has been toted out to the recycling bin, and all the stray needles have been vacuumed away. My failed mantel adornment has also been discarded. Trees are lolling on their sides on many of the sidewalks of Notting Hill. It's time for us all to get back to our routines.

Dave has one more day off work -- today is a holiday, maybe because New Year's Day fell on a Sunday -- and we plan to go into town and do some shopping. Dave needs some new shoes and a suit, so we thought we'd go down to Covent Garden and Regent Street and poke around. Then, tomorrow, he's teaching and I am faced with a big, empty, silent apartment, and the big question of what to do next.

I'm thinking about taking a photography course or workshop. I overuse the automatic setting on my digital camera -- I really need to learn more about adjusting exposures and shutter speeds manually. And there's a Buddhist center near our apartment that I am determined to check out. They key to my sanity is to get out of the house, and stay out.

How am I doing emotionally? Well, I'm still struggling with doubts about what we did and feelings of loss. I cried hard three times yesterday. But I also went vintage clothes shopping (in the pouring rain!) and got a cool shirt, and I'm doing my best to look ahead rather than behind.

(Photo: This looks like a post-Christmas photo, but it was actually taken in Battersea on Dec. 3. Must be a remnant of someone's holiday party!)

6 comments:

Reya Mellicker said...

Grieving for pets is awful because they're part of everyday routines. From morning to night were reminded of the loss. My heart is with you, Steve.

So glad you're thinking about a photography course. That sounds like lots of fun.

I, too, am resolved to get out of the house more in 2012 - for different reasons but still I love being on a wavelength.

Wish I could accompany you to Covent Garden. How fun.

Xx

Reya Mellicker said...

We're not were. iPad spell "correct."

Barbara said...

Time will eventually work its magic. But for now, the miles you go each day will have to suffice.

You have so many options for your time right now. It will be fun to follow your progress as you explore them.

Angella Lister said...

another new beginning, friend. you've had a few of those and always found your way. i'm over here cheering you on.

love,
angella

e said...

I'm sorry for your loss, but you are dealing well with things. I'm excited to hear more about your explorations with photography and other things. I have a feeling new doors will open for you and I'm happy to be cheering you on as well.

You are correct about getting out of the house, too.

Elizabeth said...

I can't imagine feeling anything other than deeply sad for a while -- go easy on yourself.