Sunday, April 3, 2022

A Schnitzel in My Pocket


Yes, that is a cocktail made to resemble the Ukrainian flag -- and called, in fact, "The Zelenskyy." Dave and I had them yesterday when we went to lunch prior to the Film Music Gala concert at Royal Albert Hall.

We went to an elegant Polish restaurant called "Ognisko Polskie," which translates to "The Polish Hearth." The food was terrific, as were the cocktails, which supposedly help generate money for Ukrainian refugee relief. (Ingredients: lemonade, apricot brandy, blue curacao and Polish vodka.) There's something a little "Let Them Eat Cake" about drinking cocktails to help refugees, but hey, we tried to do our part.

I had a Polish variety of borscht and a schnitzel, which turned out to be a breaded slab of pork the size of Colorado atop some potatoes. Dave got a variety of appetizers including some pierogis, gravlax, and some dumplings, and an apple pie dessert. As good as it was, I couldn't begin to eat that entire Schnitzel -- not without going unconscious at the concert -- so I decided to take about half of it home to Olga.

However, I didn't really think through the logistics of carrying leftovers into Royal Albert Hall. (I blame the Zelenskyy.) I wanted to keep it out of sight so I shoved the foil box in my jacket pocket. It was sealed and wrapped in a paper bag, and with my jacket around it I'm sure no one suspected a thing -- but still, concealing a slab of meat on my body is the trashiest thing I've done in a long time. I felt like Divine in "Pink Flamingoes."


This was our seat for the concert. As you can tell, we were in the choir section just behind the gong, and it seemed like pretty much a full house. (There were still empty seats when I took that photo before the performance but they filled up by the time it started.)

I got the giggles almost immediately after we sat down, thinking that I was sitting in Royal Albert Hall with a schnitzel in my pocket. Every once in a while I'd lean over to Dave during the show and say, "WHAT could this BE in my POCKET?!" I'm not sure he appreciated it as much as I did.

The musicians, from the Royal Philharmonic, played selections from movies including "E.T.," "West Side Story," "The Magnificent Seven," "Jurassic Park," "Star Wars" and, for the encore, "Rocky." It was a good lineup -- heavy on the John Williams, but that's OK -- and we enjoyed it a lot. Film music is the soundtrack to all of our lives, and a sort of classical music for the common man, it seems to me. It's not surprising these concerts are well attended. And it was great to finally be able to use these tickets we purchased three years ago!

Afterwards, we rode the bus home and presented Olga with her schnitzel. She made short work of it and I hope she appreciated the degree to which I compromised my personal dignity to bring it to her.

62 comments:

  1. Sounds like a wonderful night of music and at the Albert Hall too. I once went to see the Cirque du Soleil there and it was also a wonderful show. My late brother lived in London and we travelled down from Scotland by train and he kindly put us up for the weekend and picked up and dropped us of from various statons, a magical weekend to remember. ps love your blog.

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    1. I saw Cirque du Soleil there too, back in January 2019!

      https://shadowsteve.blogspot.com/2019/01/cirque-and-shard.html

      Was that the show you went to? Thanks for your kind words re. the blog!

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    2. It was many years ago, I think it was in the late 90s Steve. Wonderful venue, though admittedly, I haven't been to that many.

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  2. It seems to have been a weekend for my blog pals to be going to musicals! Jen was at an event with friends, yourselves, and we saw a local operatic society production of " Evita" on Friday in the recently built new Eric Morecambe hall here in Harpenden. (The old hall is supposed to be pulled down and flats built)

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    1. Oh, I love "Evita." Did you ever see Madonna's movie version? People gave her a lot of flack for it but I thought she did a good job.

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  3. I’ve always liked John Williams soundtracks but never listened to one with a schnitzel in my pocket!

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    1. It's certainly a more subversive listening experience! LOL

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  4. In The Royal Albert Hall...

    HYACINTH I can smell pork Richard!
    RICHARD Well it's not me Hyacinth. I showered this morning.
    HYACINTH And did you apply the lily of the valley scented deodorant I bought you for Christmas?
    RICHARD (exasperated) Yessss, Yes I did dearest. (Pause) Funnily enough I can smell pork too. It reminds me of that schnitzel I had in Vienna.
    HYACINTH (Whispering) Do you think the odour is coming from these two American chaps in front of us?
    RICHARD (sniffing) Ugh! I think you are right. Perhaps that is how all Americans smell.
    HYACINTH Don't be ridiculous Richard! I think I shall call an usher to complain!
    RICHARD Oh please don't make a scene Hyacinth!
    STEVE REED (Turning round) Shhh! The concert is about to begin.

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  5. I love the look of those drinks! What a great schnitzel story. What we humans do to please our pets!
    I does feel good to be out and attending shows again. Three years is a long time to wait for a concert.

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    1. I'm tempted to get tickets for next year, but now I'm a little wary of buying so far in advance!

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  6. What very pretty drinks. I would have selflessly drunk heaps of them for such a good cause.

    I would have asked to feel the schnitzel in your pocket to ensure its wellbeing and that it was safely contained.

    I don't know of such seats being available at musical concerts. How terrific and I am pleased you enjoyed yourselves.

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    1. No, you may not feel my schnitzel! (Well, maybe after another Zelenskyy...)

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  7. I only imagine the people sitting around, as they're leaving the concert, saying, "I don't what it was about the music, but I am starving for a schnitzel!"

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  8. Is that a schnitzel in your pocket or are you just glad to see me? What is it about the very word "schnitzel" that is funny? What a great story! I think you need a man purse.
    Those are just about the prettiest drinks I've ever seen.

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    1. "Schnitzel" IS a funny word. It wouldn't have been as funny if I'd had, say, shrimp scampi in my pocket. (I think shrimp would be harder to conceal smell-wise.)

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  9. I can definitely detect the influence of the Zelenskyy on your mood of the afternoon! I can see Dave thinking that's the last time I go anywhere with him after a midday cocktail, packing meat, giggling, nudging me, gah!

    I like movie music very much, movies not so much. And adaptations of classical composition, like the great background to The Chamomile Lawn, or the Gully Jimson movie, title escapes me, but it was Prokofiev Lieutenant Kije, I believe.

    There's a special talent in creating music that grasps the mood of a movie or selects music as background.

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    1. Yes, exactly, movie music has to capture the mood of the film but not be too obtrusive. It's a very specialized style of composing, which is why people like John Williams and Elmer Bernstein have made such impressive careers.

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  10. The schnitzel story is hilariious but so is the word gravlax - it sounds like an over-the-counter remedy for GI distress but Google informs me it is cured salmon that was "traditionally buried" - thanks for the smiles today and I'm glad you had a good time!

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    1. "Gravlax" IS a funny word. That's actually the Nordic word for it -- in Polish it was something like "Gravadlax." I wonder if Dave's was buried? That's a little snippet of info I didn't know and now I'm glad I didn't taste it!

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  11. I'll bet you were the first person ever to go to Royal Albert hall with a schnitzel in his pocket. The idea of it gave me the giggles. You do love that dog!

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    1. And she LOVED the schnitzel when it finally got home to her!

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  12. Is that a schnitzel in your pocket or are you just glad to see me? ha ha Was it fragrant? Did you smell like schnitzel? I can just imagine the person sitting on the other side of you wondering where that smell was coming from. Back when we had no work and no money because we had no work, we would go to the movie matinee on Fridays but would buy our drink and candy at the convenience store and smuggle it in. I was always nervous thinking someone would stop us about the bulge in our pockets but turns out people who work in movie theaters don't care.

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    1. Actually I honestly don't think it smelled at all. The container was well-sealed. But maybe I just couldn't smell it because I was carrying it!

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  13. I have to say I don't it would have ever thought I'd read a blog post about taking a schnitzel leftover to the Royal Albert Hall. That combination is so delightfully funny. Sounds like a wonderful concert there, and I'm glad Olga liked her treat.

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    1. See? You never know WHAT you'll get here at Shadows & Light! LOL

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  14. So that's what a schnitzel is!

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  15. I like show tunes done in "classical" style. Listen to Strato Vani for some fun music.

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    1. I don't know Strato-Vani! At first I thought you meant Mantovani.

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  16. Your title reminded me of Mae West, "Is that a pistol in your pants or are you just glad to see me?"

    A schnitzel in your pocket, you dirty bird. Way too funny and I'm sure Olga loves you even more that she did before.

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  17. You had me laughing with the entire schnitzel bit! Was the gong used in the performance? Talk about up close and personal!

    I would have loved this performance. Such good music!

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    1. The gong WAS used, but it wasn't as thunderous as one might expect. I can't remember which piece it was used for.

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  18. That Cocktail is visually stunning, so is the Ukrainian Prez actually and so much more than just a Handsome Face, he's my new Hero and represents what Leaders should act and be like, if only every Politician were like him, Right?! The Marie Antoinette reference, yes, the things us 1st World Privileged are doing seem bougee, but if it helps the Cause, it's doing our small part and getting involved. And Divine Moment in Royal Albert Hall... Meat in your Pocket, you Trashy fella you, I wouldn't have been able to stop Laughing/Giggling, I'm such a Child like that, or so I'm told by my Adult Grandkids... who I embarrass all of the time with my Behavior. Just think if you'd had an Accident on the way Home... and explaining that in the ER... my Mom always had the Ole' Addage, make sure you have Clean Undergarments on... she assumed we weren't going Commando you see...

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    1. Can you imagine what might have happened if the president of Afghanistan had hung in there like Zelenskyy and led his troops, rather than hopping on a plane and deserting the country?

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  19. I've lost all respect for you, Steve. I can't believe you played Hide The Schnitzel at a concert. This story made me laugh. The drink is pretty, and I have no doubt it's delicious.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. It WAS good. It basically tasted like lemonade with vodka.

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  20. There is a children's story in there somewhere- the dinner that finally made it home to the dog after having a cultural night out.The Ukrainian drink looks like something a child might like as well.
    Glad you persuaded Dave to go

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    1. That schnitzel went where no schnitzel has gone before!

      (Actually I bet other people have done similar things in the past...)

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  21. How fantastic Steve, what seats,
    I’ve only been once
    I adore the place asa venue

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    1. They are amazing seats, especially for Dave. As a music teacher he loves watching the musicians up close, particularly the percussion.

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  22. What a delightful evening, including those beautiful drinks! The food in the pocket gave me some giggles though. You are lucky that someone didn't have a support/guide dog at this production. :)

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    1. LOL -- I didn't even think of the possibility of a guide dog! That would have been problematic!

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  23. When we were on a bike tour in the Czech Republic, we stopped for lunch and were encouraged to order a schnitzel. Jim got one,it was the size of the plate. I was pretty happy with my small lunch order.

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    1. Yeah, what is the deal with gigantic schnitzels?

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  24. Those drinks are lovely! And that is HILARIOUS about you carrying the schnitzel in your pocket - hahaha! And now I'm in the mood for pierogies. Yum!

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    1. I tasted Dave's pierogis, and they were good!

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  25. I'd totally forgotten I'd been to the Royal Albert Hall, once, as a 15 year old, during a school outing to London (from the Netherlands). I can't remember what was played but that the place was huge! We also saw Ipi Tombi, I think in the Astoria, what a show that was .. wow, you got me taking a trip down memory Lane right now .. I'll also never look at a schnitzel the same!

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    1. I had to look up Ipi Tombi -- somehow that cultural moment passed me by!

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  26. What A Setlist There Brother Reed - Way Cool

    Cheers

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  27. Love The Zelenskyy, that's a nice tribute.
    Why are restaurant schnitzels always so damn huge? Is there a law that says "your schnitzels must overflow the biggest platter in your establishment"?
    I make my own right here at home, (I use chicken instead of pork) it's a messy process but worth the trouble as I make enough to have several meals worth in the freezer, and they are always small enough to leave room on the plate for vegetables. Sometimes I'll make mini ones (like nuggets from Macca's) and serve them with chips. Also home made.
    The concert sounds wonderful, I often like what I hear on movie soundtracks.

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    1. I am genuinely not sure why schnitzels have to be large. I had Wiener Schnitzel in Vienna many years ago and I seem to remember it was pretty hefty, too.

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  28. Loved this entry, it read like a David Sedaris piece but better (not so overworked). You're very funny!

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    1. Oh, Sedaris could have told it much better than me! But thank you. :)

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  29. Those drinks look delicious! Not to fear, I'm sure Olga enjoyed her dinner. Hugs, Edna B.

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  30. What a great story. You hate to say, "Can I check my schnitzel?" So, what's a guy to do? I love where you sat. But now I'm worried -- did you smell like schnitzel? The xylophonist would get hungry with schnitzel fragrance in the air! Now, are you sure that the Ukrainian "Zelynskyy" didn't make you a little extra willing to throw caution to the wind? (It looks delicious!)

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  31. Your schnitzel story is hilarious. They do tend to be large.

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