Thursday, April 17, 2008

Love on the Subway

Last night I got to indulge in one of my favorite activities. I went to Chipotle on St. Mark’s Place after work for a burrito, and I sat in the window watching the parade of cute guys on the street below. Chipotle is built up above the street, so from the window I have a great vantage point! And St. Mark’s Place, with its erstwhile bohemian atmosphere (and its proximity to NYU) always attracts lots of cuties.

People-watching really is one of my favorite activities - I’m not kidding. Not only because people in New York are so interesting, but also because a lot of them are so attractive!

I have a friend who says he falls in love on the subway every morning. I know just what he means.

When I first started practicing Zen, I had the idea that I was supposed to quell feelings of desire. But as I understand it now, elimination isn’t really the goal. It’s more about what to do with desires. When I see an attractive guy, of course I feel a flush of desire - but the trick is not to cling to it, not to obsess about it, not to become envious or fixated. Instead I just think, “Geez, that guy is HOT!” (or “hawt,” as some of my friends spell it). And two minutes later, ideally, he’s gone from my mind. (If he’s really cute, he might hang around slightly longer than that.)

Human beings are amazing, when you think about it. All the different ways we’re put together, the ways we attract each other, the things each of us finds appealing. What a panorama, a spectrum! I wouldn't want to stop desire completely - as if it were even possible. Where's the fun in that?

(Photo: Shadow in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, March 2008)


Anonymous said...

It's a never ending flow (or flood) of perceptions, ideas, desires, spontaneous laughter (much of it not out loud) curiosity (What's THAT thing?) when we're just wandering around through life. Doesn't it feel good to have it all happening? I love people watching too.

Anonymous said...

now why did these musings about love on the subway remind me of a book read oh so ever long ago about love on an airplane and the infamous zipless fuck?

people watching - definitely, the best entertainment around!!

Anonymous said...

Mouse: That's me -- the gay Erica Jong! (Ha!)

Anonymous said...

Dennis wonders, did the burrito have chicken in it?

Anonymous said...

lol at your comment here Steve.

i get that too, falling in love every morning... One of the best things about spring/summer - wearing shades and being able to watch without seeming rude!

(yes, will be wearing shades in NYC, whatever the weather!)

fabfabfab photo

Anonymous said...

Stop desire? Surely, you jest, my good man. Non-attachment is about moving with things, no? staying unstuck. (Or else what do you do? Shut down one half of your brain?No thank you veddy much.)
Wishing you a parade of cuties to flush over during the weekend.

Anonymous said...

Dennis: No chicken. Sorry, pal. (It did have sour cream in it, though - how do you feel about that?)

Lettuce: Here's hoping the weather warms up here, so you can put your shades to better use. :)

Lee: Exactly! Well put!

Anonymous said...

Wow! This is the first post where I've ever seen you talk about cute guys! Bravo! ;-) I love people watching too - LOVE IT! It's so fun.