Friday, May 14, 2010

Squirrel Invasion!

I was sitting in our living room yesterday morning, reading, when I heard the unmistakable sound of an animal clunking around in one of our closets. At first I thought it was one of the dogs, but then realized both were with me. This was something else. It sounded big.

I traced the sound to the back of the air conditioning closet, where there's a duct that seemed to house the trapped animal. It scrabbled around and occasionally squeaked frantically. I couldn't see it -- it was either inside the duct or in the wall. I called maintenance but by the time the workers showed up, the animal had quieted, and then remained quiet all day.

I thought it had escaped, but no such luck. When evening came, it started up again -- scratching and clawing and squeaking. That squeak, really more of a squeal, was the most pathetic thing I've ever heard. Eventually it began chewing, and then I realized that the back of the air conditioner closet -- an area tucked so far behind our air handler that I couldn't reach it even if I'd wanted to -- was also the side wall of the closet in our spare bedroom. I could hear the beastie behind that baseboard, chewing away.

I was home alone, and determined to get it out. It sounded so scared, and the idea of allowing it to die behind the wall was just too awful. I was pretty sure it was a squirrel, but I didn't care if it was the biggest, meanest brown rat on the wharf -- I was going to free it.

I had some tools, but I didn't want to just tear into the wall willy-nilly. So I called maintenance again, and this time the maintenance man heard the beast. He agreed we could open the wall, and he began the job with a carpet knife from our toolbox. When we made a small hole, we could see the trapped animal, which was indeed a young squirrel. It treated us like attackers, not rescuers, lashing out with its little claws and squealing and moaning in fear. (I'd never heard a squirrel moan. But trust me, they do.)

The maintenance man left to get some more tools and I made the hole larger. When it was about three inches across and two inches high, I was confident the squirrel could emerge. Problem is, it was so scared it didn't want to, and there was no way to safely reach in and grab it. I stapled a cloth laundry bag over the hole and baited it with peanut butter, thinking the squirrel might climb into the bag. No such luck.

Finally I removed the bag, turned out the light, opened the window and closed the bedroom door, thinking the squirrel might escape outside by itself. It came out of the wall pretty quickly, but then didn't seem to know what to do. It scampered around the bedroom, which is unfortunately our storage area -- unorganized and full of lots of squirrel hiding places.

About this time, Dave came home. We gave the squirrel the suitably androgynous name of Sam.

At least now I knew it was going to survive. I put down a saucer of water and a few chopped walnuts, and Dave and I went to bed, thinking it might get outside by itself during the night. But this morning, it was still there, tucked into a corner.

So we began the arduous process of removing everything from the room -- boxes, luggage, a bicycle, pictures, stacks of books. Finally we had almost everything out and there were few places left for the squirrel to hide. We chased it around with a bedsheet for a while, finally trapping it. We took it outside and it streaked away toward a bush, no doubt thinking it had gotten the best of us.

I can't tell you how relieved I am.


  1. what a fiasco! i just heard a story from someone who lives in brooklyn heights about a squirrel getting into their place. those little buggers are cute until they're sitting on your couch.

  2. Steve. that squirrel is lucky it wandered into your house. You and Dave went to great lengths to return it to freedom. I think I would have given up when the scared thing bit and clawed at me. I would have definitely called in a professional at that point!

  3. They will sing songs of praise to you in the squirrel community for many generations to come. You're so good, Steve. You are.

  4. I'm so glad you didn't kill Sam or leave him to die in his hysteria. You are my hero!

  5. blimey, what a palaver! poor little thing

    I guess you'll look at squirrels slightly differently for a while?

  6. I can't dd anything,so I'll leave it at a job well done.

  7. sorry about the damage to your crib, man , but I was kinda scared.

  8. poor scared squirrel....

    yeah to steve and dave for helping the squirrel to freedom!

    my parents are constantly plagued with squirrels in their attic.